No. 7925934. Sgt. Greenwood.
C Sqdn, 9th Battn R.T.R.
B.A.O.R.
28.11.45
Wednesday
D -3
Jessie Mine: I have been to a lecture today – at a place called Alfeld – about 10 miles away. It was given by a civilian, presumably an employee of the Ministry of Labour, and dealt with the problems of ‘re-settlement’ and re-employment for we potential civilians. It was a good lecture, and very instructive for those who have no particular job awaiting them or anyone who had doubts about the government “re-instatement of employment” measures. I am glad I attended it, even though I have little doubt about my post-war employment.
Apart from this lecture, I have done nothing all day… apart from trying to keep warm. This is a cold and cheerless place without mistake: we don’t even have the customary morning ‘break’ for a cup of tea:- but I have overcome this handicap by going to the men’s canteen for my cup of tea.
The weather is being pretty foul just now – with plenty of rain and mud… and icy winds all day long. I can’t tell you how I am longing to get away from it all.
As you can imagine, I am now living more or less in a dream – I have a peculiar feeling of detachment and cannot concentrate on doing anything at all. I still have some ‘work’ to do… paper work appertaining to our lorries etc which are being transferred to H.Q… but I’ve ceased to worry about it – and just don’t care a damn whether I leave it unfinished. Strictly speaking, it is work which should be done by an officer – but I have done it each month since taking on the transport job. Maybe I will leave it this time – and let the other bloke do it. That’s the mood I’m in, dear: bad, isn’t it!
I cannot think of anything else I have to tell you just now… and I’m not in a fit mental state to deal with abstract things. It is awful, Jess… deliciously awful… this waiting and waiting – and wondering whether it can possibly be true. I’m almost dreading these next two days.
I must tell you about a little idiosyncrasy I have developed these last few days – but please keep it secret. It is just that I have become positively nervous of walking along the roads. I imagine all sorts of things, but most frequently, I visualise a lorry wheel coming loose and knocking me out in the ditch-! Silly, isn’t it – but it just shows the state of my nerves! And that Channel crossing – I’ve already imagined a sea strewn with floating mines and god knows what. I will have to take up patience or cross-word puzzles to occupy my mind…
But when I get home… when I am with my love… Ah Jess… I’m wearing my brain out thinking about it. It is all coming true, dear… but – oh – it would be such a relief if I could sleep through the next ten days… and wake up in your arms…
Jessie – Jess…
I love you – so much.
Goodnight…
Always – Your Trevy.